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A song about domestic violence?
A song about a common outcome of domestic violence?
It’s about time.
“Surrender” by Roger Taylor
Roger Taylor is not only a singer, songwriter, and drummer for the band Queen, but is an incredible solo artist as well. Roger has a new album, The Outsider Tour Live, and the first single released is “Surrender.”
This song has affected me in ways other songs about DV have not; given me shivers and tears of sadness for my friend Silvia who was killed by her husband, Wilbur Frank.
Silvia Frank was a midwifery client of mine through two pregnancies. During our visits, we discussed the domestic violence occurring and her need to leave, but, as is typical of abused people, she minimized the violence she was experiencing, even as she acknowledged the need to escape.
Silvia went to nursing school, becoming a labor and delivery nurse on her way to becoming a midwife. She saw this as the economic way to get out of the emotional and violent ways Frank used to control her.
Sadly, Frank ended her attempts at freedom.
He killed Silvia in front of one of their teenage daughters.
Wilbur Frank was sentenced to 50 years in prison.
“Surrender” Addresses Death as the Escape
The most chilling part of the song “Surrender,” is found in these lyrics:
“You can’t hurt me now, I’m gone from you
You can’t hurt me now
You can’t hurt me now
You can’t reach me where I’ve gone to
It is left open in the song whether the woman was able to leave, was killed, or died by suicide. I find the lyrics brilliantly vague because the possibilities are all accurate.
Hope Versus Reality
Most people believe all the abused person has to do is pack up the kids and leave in order to save themselves. The reality is the most dangerous time for them is within the first 18 months after leaving the abusive partner.
This is exactly the window in which Silvia was killed.
Thank You, Roger Taylor
Thanks, Roger, for illuminating the sad reality abused people face in order to escape the pain of domestic violence. I hope the song reaches those that need to hear it most.