“I’m Going Slightly Mad”

Good News

My Cardiac Stress Test came back no blockage in my heart. I am ecstatic about that! I’ve tortured my heart since I was 11 years old, so it’s actually shocking. The summary suggested “Lifestyle Changes.”

Doing it!

Crankiness

I fucking hate Risperdal. I hadn’t taken it in a few (many) days and took the 1mg prescribed and was so groggy all day as if I had taken Trazodone. I hate dreamless sleep. Still was only five hours total, but felt horrible when awake.

What is the price of non-compliance?

I will see if there is something else I can take when I talk to the psych next week.

What Does “Slightly Mad” Look Like?

Maybe I am just in Hypomania with teensy bits of manic hallucinations. 

(Can you hear me laughing as I try and rationalize my behavior and thoughts? If I was listening to myself, I would be shaking my head and saying, “Stop it!”)

Thankfully, I am not listening to myself.

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