I was in jail for Welfare Fraud in the late 90’s.
I was the only guilty person incarcerated, but I was guilty. I did pay back all I owed, I served 21 days in jail and 300 hours of community service as well as 5 years’ probation.
But this is about the food I had to eat in jail.
It was ghastly.
And I was really fat, the fattest person in there, by far. I had to wear men’s jail uniforms because none of the women’s ones fit me.
So eating jail food as a fat chick? Extra gross.
Mornings were the best time. Frosted Flakes, powdered donuts and a banana were common breakfasts. Yes, all on one tray.
After that, lunch and dinner were vile.
(And I know, one does not expect gourmet food in jail and I suppose it could be used as a deterrent for some people to not do the crime, but I had no clue what I was in for when I was handcuffed and taken in. And yes, I do know there are constant debates about why inmates even get free food at all, but at the time, these were not part of my reality.)
Unknown mush that was supposed to be meat (so what if I was a vegetarian… I ate it or went without; I ate it), unknown mush vegetables…
…(I remember green beans with bacon, but the green beans were so overcooked as to nearly be baby food) and milk or fruit punch. I think a piece of fresh fruit, but my mind is stuck on the grossness of the other items on the plate.
The absolute worst was the morning we got an egg. It was purple!
I had not one clue why, but when I took a bite, I spit it right back out into my napkin, the girls on each side of me were pissed I was wasting good food. It was one of the grossest tasting foods ever. It wasn’t until many years later that I learned it had been pickled. Pickled eggs. Like pickled pig’s feet. Disgusting.
As I researched this, I see that jails around the world have issues with jail food and in some places have rioted to get better rations.
I am not even sure how to finish this. Perhaps with another picture from a jail that looked similar to what I was fed.
Incredibly appetizing, right?
Navelgazing Writer 